Thi-i-i-is close to tanking

The holding tank is almost done. Whew! I just have to hook the hoses up. That involves sawing and grabbing & twisting, which are a bitch for me, so I'm going to do that in between other tasks.

I need to replace the vent line so I'll go easy on the head until I get that done.

I won't tell you what it was like to get the old holding tank out. It was formerly used by someone with very different ideas of sanitation and stink-control, and that morning's pumpout was, wow, not nearly as thorough as it should have been. I consulted Russell and Regis beforehand, though, and of course I've smelled far worse in a prior life, so I managed it pretty well. Hardly spilled a drop.

The 20-gallon tank was too big to go into the hatch with the old platform in place. The guy who put that platform in used cheap screws and unbelievably soft wood, so I couldn't unscrew anything without stripping it and the wood couldn't provide enough resistance to be levered out. I had to resort to the chisel. I have a graphite-handled hammer, which was SO worth the extra couple of bucks I spent on it. It absorbs so much of the shock I'd rather hammer than do almost anything else with my hand tools.

After pulling out the old platform, I put in a bracket to hold the extension, and premeasured and drilled the marine-grade, 3/4 inch plywood planks I was using for the new platform. I took the wood back out so I could get the tank in.

I got that big bad boy in, bending the laws of physics once or twice I think. Anyway, it went in, right side up and correct end facing the tubing, leaving all my digits intact.

Working on one end at a time, I lifted the tank with an elbow while I jimmied the closely-cut planks into position. I had forgotten to budget for some structures inside the hatch, so, after realizing one plank could not possibly fit the available passage, I decided it had to and suddenly it did.

I still can't figure that one out, but I won't look a gift horse in the mouth.

I've put eye-bolts in strategic places to strap the tank to. The previous owner didn't have his holding tank strapped down. Might be one reason why the inlet hose had to be 7 feet long -- a breeding-ground of smelly anaerobes and seepage.

I replaced the inlet tubing, needless to say. It's just over 3 feet long in my arrangement. Getting it through the bulkhead (= wall) and into the toilet valve was gymnastic: at one point, I was standing on my head which was facing one way and resting in the bilge, while the rest of my body corkscrewed up the hull and out the hatch until my heels tapped against the underside of the shelf above.

I got out by getting a shoulder under my neck, then using my postural muscles to worm me along until I could get some leverage with my feet on the doorframe, then sort of unscrewing myself from the bowels of my boat. I had no idea I could bend that way without special surgery or heavy drugs, but it was fun.

I got everything screwed down for the meantime, but I need to put in some responsible hardware; this stuff is for the birds.

I have to cut the hoses to size and jam them in, then double-seal everything with two opposing hose clamps each, so nothing can escape.

Then I'll be tanked.

If I sound rather smug, it's because I am. Every person I spoke to about this in the planning stages, even those who know how poor I am, said, "You should hire someone to do that. It's an awful job. It's really hard. I don't think you could do that."

Hah! So much for that spiritless, mealy-mouthed wambling.